Placeholder text taken from The IT Crowd

From today, dialing 999 won't get you the Emergency Services, and that's not the only thing that's changing! I've got Aunt Irma visiting. Oh, do you not like Aunt Irma? I've got an aunt like that. You can come down here any time and I'll be waiting for you! [slams down phone] That told her! Uh... okay, well, the button on the side, is it glowing? Yes! If there were such a thing as a drudgeon, that is what we'd be to them. See the driver hooks a function by patching the system call table, so its not safe to unload it unless another thread's about to jump in there and do its stuff, and you don't want to end up in the middle of invalid memory! Oh really? Then why don't you come down and make me then.

Might want to play a bit hard to get. So, remember the new number! 0118 999! 88199, 9119 725! ... 3! If anyone was ever rude to me, I used to carry their food around in my trousers. Oh my God! Before you brought it to their table? No, after! Of course, before! Why would I do it after? It's my term for my time of the month. Oh. What time of the month? The weekend? You know, it's high tide. But we're not on the coast. I'm closed for maintenance! Closed for maintenance? I've fallen to the communists! Well, they do have some strong arguments. I'll put this over here, with the rest of the fire. From today, dialing 999 won't get you the Emergency Services, and that's not the only thing that's changing!

No, no there you go, no there you go. I just heard it come on. Hello? I've had a bit of a tumble. Unbelievable! Some idiot disabled his firewall, meaning all the computers on Seven are teeming with viruses, plus I've just had to walk all the way down the motherfudging stairs, because the lifts are broken AGAIN! A story of a young man trying to find his sexuality in the uncaring Thatcher years. Warning: Contains scenes of graphic homoeroticism. How long have you been disabled? Ten years? Ten years, and how did it happen? If that's not a rude question. Acid? When I started Reynholm Industries, I had just two things in my possession: a dream and 6 million pounds. While he was eating, did you hear anyone laughing? Like... in the kitchen area? Yes! Yes I did, actually, yes I did. That'd be trouser food!

Yes! If there were such a thing as a drudgeon, that is what we'd be to them. How can you two... Don't Google the question, Moss! I don't see how they couldn't just keep it as it was. How hard is it to remember 911? While he was eating, did you hear anyone laughing? Like... in the kitchen area? Yes! Yes I did, actually, yes I did. That'd be trouser food! They just toss us away like yesterday's jam. How can you two... Don't Google the question, Moss! Might want to play a bit hard to get.

No, no, that's the music you heard when it come on. From today, dialing 999 won't get you the Emergency Services, and that's not the only thing that's changing! OK. Moss, what did you have for breakfast this morning? Smarties cereal. You know, it's high tide. But we're not on the coast. I'm closed for maintenance! Closed for maintenance? I've fallen to the communists! Well, they do have some strong arguments. If anyone was ever rude to me, I used to carry their food around in my trousers. Oh my God! Before you brought it to their table? No, after! Of course, before! Why would I do it after? I mean, they have no respect for us up there! No respect whatsoever! We're all just drudgeons to them! Well that's easy to remember. 0118 999 88199 9119 725! ... 3!

From today, dialing 999 won't get you the Emergency Services, and that's not the only thing that's changing! Hello? I've had a bit of a tumble. We don't need no education. Yes you do. You've just used a double negative. Yes! Yesterday's jam. That is what we are to them!... Actually, that doesn't work, as a thing, because, you know, jam lasts for ages. Oh really? Then why don't you come down and make me then. We don't need no education. Yes you do. You've just used a double negative. Hello, IT. Have you tried forcing an unexpected reboot?

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