Placeholder text taken from The IT Crowd

If anyone was ever rude to me, I used to carry their food around in my trousers. Oh my God! Before you brought it to their table? No, after! Of course, before! Why would I do it after? If anyone was ever rude to me, I used to carry their food around in my trousers. Oh my God! Before you brought it to their table? No, after! Of course, before! Why would I do it after? You're not comfortable with your sexuality? Oh, I'm very comfortable with my sexuality, I just don't want to be slapped in the face with their sexuality. He's had quite an evening. Someone stole his wheelchair. Did you see who it was? Red bearded man. Hello, IT. Have you tried forcing an unexpected reboot? You know, it's high tide. But we're not on the coast. I'm closed for maintenance! Closed for maintenance? I've fallen to the communists! Well, they do have some strong arguments. No, no, that's the music you heard when it come on.

Dear Sir stroke Madam, I am writing to inform you of a fire which has broken out at the premises of... Yeah, you do know how a button works don't you? No, not on clothes. No, no there you go, no there you go. I just heard it come on. I am a man, he's a man, we're men! Ok, tell me how your feeling. I feel delicate... and annoyed, and... I think I'm ugly. Carrie, Moss! First scene in Carrie! Oh. Okay Oh really? Then why don't you come down and make me then. Hello, IT. Have you tried turning it off and on again?

Today I have a business empire the like of which the world has never seen the like of which. I hope it doesn't sound arrogant when I say that I am the greatest man in the world! We don't need no education. Yes you do. You've just used a double negative. They just toss us away like yesterday's jam. You're not comfortable with your sexuality? Oh, I'm very comfortable with my sexuality, I just don't want to be slapped in the face with their sexuality. No, no, that's the music you heard when it come on. 0115... no... 0118... no... 0118 999 ... 3. Hello? Is this the emergency services? Then which country am I speaking to? Hello? Hello? A story of a young man trying to find his sexuality in the uncaring Thatcher years. Warning: Contains scenes of graphic homoeroticism.

How long have you been disabled? Ten years? Ten years, and how did it happen? If that's not a rude question. Acid? I don't see how they couldn't just keep it as it was. How hard is it to remember 911? Unbelievable! Some idiot disabled his firewall, meaning all the computers on Seven are teeming with viruses, plus I've just had to walk all the way down the motherfudging stairs, because the lifts are broken AGAIN! OK. Moss, what did you have for breakfast this morning? Smarties cereal. I've got Aunt Irma visiting. Oh, do you not like Aunt Irma? I've got an aunt like that. I'm going to murder you... You bloody woman! Huh, what you think I'm afraid of you? I'm not afraid of you.

You know, it's high tide. But we're not on the coast. I'm closed for maintenance! Closed for maintenance? I've fallen to the communists! Well, they do have some strong arguments. How long have you been disabled? Ten years? Ten years, and how did it happen? If that's not a rude question. Acid? No, that's the music you hear when... I'm sorry are you from the past? Carrie, Moss! First scene in Carrie! Oh. Okay I am a man, he's a man, we're men! Ok, tell me how your feeling. I feel delicate... and annoyed, and... I think I'm ugly. Yes! If there were such a thing as a drudgeon, that is what we'd be to them. I don't see how they couldn't just keep it as it was. How hard is it to remember 911?

It's my term for my time of the month. Oh. What time of the month? The weekend? Graphic homoeroticism? Does that mean they're going to get them out? I'm a 32 year old IT-man who works in a basement. Yes, I do the whole Lonely Hearts thing! When I started Reynholm Industries, I had just two things in my possession: a dream and 6 million pounds. I mean, they have no respect for us up there! No respect whatsoever! We're all just drudgeons to them! Dear Sir stroke Madam. Fire, exclamation mark. Fire, exclamation mark. Help me, exclamation mark. 123 Carrendon Road. Looking forward to hearing from you. All the best, Maurice Moss. So, remember the new number! 0118 999! 88199, 9119 725! ... 3!

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